Merry "X" mas

The holiday season is endlessly busy without a baby, but with one it ever more busy...and fun. This year I did my shopping almost entirely on the internet. Amazon.com was my best friend. But even with that savior I still had to trek out into the chaos that is store-land at Christmas time. The little guy was a trooper. He is such a good baby. He went all around from IKEA to Costco to Kohls. It wasn't easy but we made it.

The highlights of this Christmas for us aside from the usual family time and the obvious fact that we now have a kiddo to share it all with is that Xanders Aunt Mim and her kiddos came up for Christmas from Arizona! Wahoo! It is always great to see them. We even had a more brief, but just as nice visit from Uncle Kev. We also had some nice houseguests- Xander's Nonnie and Poppie, as well as their foreign exchange student Valeria. It is always so nice to have family around to share the season together. The more the merrier!


It was a successful year for all - Xander got stackable rings, a bunch of clothes, a boon (squeezable spoon) for eating, a remote helicopter (to watch), books, some stuffed animals, and more.

It was fun and merry...just as it should be.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Four whole months!

I think time flies by faster and faster each month. I can't believe our little guy is four months-old. The good news is this month was a check up so we have some stats for ya.

14.875 lbs. (a little lighter than we thought he would be...probably because he vomits half of what he eats up...the Dr. didn't seem concerned.)

50th percentile for weight (same as 2nd month) 14.875 lbs.
75th percentile for head size (up from 50th in 2nd month) 16.92 inches

Here is the real kicker! over 97th percentile for height! (up from 50% at 2nd month) - 27.75 inches.

We have ourselves a tall skinny boy on our hands (with a larger than average cranium :-) ) The doctor remarked again how strong and alert he is and how he is "behaving like a six-month old." That is my boy....exceeding all expectations :-). She also gave us the go ahead for starting solids in a couple weeks. So rice cereal here we come!



It has been another months of firsts...of course being that he is only 4 months old that should be a given. This month he:

• experienced his FIRST snow (see previous post)
• is more alert than ever
• still loves to squeal...especially when hanging in his bed or late at night:
• always wakes up with a smile...and usually babbles to himself for a while
• still likes to go to bed at 2 Am (ugh). BUT...
  
• still sleeps through the night (wahoo!).
• loves his jumper:
• loves to show off (as witnessed by the Dr. when he wouldn't stop squealing at her while she was trying to listen to his heart)
• loves to have "conversations" with anyone that is willing to talk to him
• has started to really be fascinated by toys and is reaching out to grab things!
• will put anything within reach into his mouth - preferably his own hand or a dads' hand.
• is a very good shopper - which is awesome during Christmas time
• WILL watch tv if given the opportunity - even if we try to not give him the opportunity

As much as I frown on the idea of exulting physical achievement I was very very proud this month when he rolled over for the first time from back to front! It was a very exciting day. Brandon was at work and I had just left the room. When I came back he was no longer on his back where I left him but on his stomach - somewhat shocked and didn't know what to do with himself. I grabbed the camera...texted Brandon...and was determined to capture his second roll-over if not his first. Unfortunately, his excitement over the camera in his face made that an impossibility. So instead I had to leave the room again for him to do it :-( Sure enough he did it again out of my view. Finally on the third time I was there...




So the fourth time was flawless...by this time he had gotten over all the hurdles of that nasty right arm and could flip over without much of a problem at all. Now it happens ALL the time...I feel it is somewhat out of his control because once he gets over he usually isn't very happy. But every time he is put down...legs are pulled up and he starts heading over. Kind of funny to watch. This process lead to his next favorite discovery - his feat! He now is FASCINATED with is feet and will pull at them and talk to them all the time:

It is absolutely amazing how quickly he develops. It seems like yesterday we were securing his head as we carried him around. Now it seems like all we can do is secure his whole body so he doesn't leap from our arms. He is so curious about the world around him - limited only by his physical abilities he can't wait to get out and see (and taste) it all.

In the early days of his fifth month he is beginning to sit without support (it is still a bit of a balancing act, but he's getting there). He notices his bottle as we are preparing it and gets excited for it and he has started to show signs of anguish when we leave out of his sight. I know it will be a whole new world in just a four weeks. I can't wait to make that report.

snow!

I wanted so bad to document his first snow but wasn't sure how to do it. I bundled him up it what seemed to be the most water proof outfit and headed outside. Now how do I take a picture of a little guy who can't sit, stand, or much of anything. So I looked to my tacky green plastic dining set :), plopped it in the snow, and propped him up. Tacky setting but cute baby :).

I then took him to the park strip and wanted to show just how much it had snowed so I decided to quickly take the plunge and dump him in the snow. I laid him right in it and quickly took some pictures before child protection services could be called and scooped him up. The pictures remind me of A Christmas Story or if someone had abandoned some poor kid on the side of the road...hahaha.




It was his first "snow day" and it was as painful as snow is supposed to be. :)

THREE months and growing strong...

Last Tuesday we celebrated the little guy's three month birthday. Okay, really we did nothing and at the end of the day I panicked and took some pictures to mark the occasion.

Boy he is getting cuter and cuter as anyone who has seen him lately will attest to. :-) Not a ton of changes over the last month except that he is getting HUGE. He weighed in at 14 pounds which puts him at twice as big as he was when he was born.

He is also loving to explore his voice by screaming with delight over and over and over....all with a smile on his face. It is fun to watch. He is genuinely laughing when tickled and tracking his dads all over the room.



He has also started to hold himself up when we put him on his tummy. He can push himself quite high. According to "what to expect the first year" he should be up to a 90 degree angle by the end of this month and he seems to already be there. Pretty amazing. Here is the run down of the third month:

He still loves to spit up - volumes

He still loves to laugh, play, and be sung to.

He LOVES to sit in his bassinet and watch the ceiling fan go - he will squeal at it for enough time for Dad to hop in the shower. Yay!


He will roll over when we put on his tummy over to his back...a lot.

He has started to grab things with his hands and, of course, bring them directly towards his mouth. He started with his bib but has moved to other objects (when placed properly in front of him).

He still LOVES "Hooray for Diffendoofer Day" - which is unfortunate because I now hate it. I am actively looking for new books with bright pictures and rhymes. That is what he likes best. In fact, I just spent $100 on used books from half.com...they should be coming soon. This shows how desperate I am to find a replacement for Diffendoofer Day.

He is still sleeping long hours for the night which is SO awesome. We stopped the swinging action of the swing but he still sleeps in it. For some reason we don't dare put him in the bassinet at night because we are afraid we will not get our sleep. At 11:00 at night that conscience decision is very very hard.

Everyone says how smiley he is - and he is a smiler that is for sure. Although to be honest we only post his smiley pictures for all to see. My ears still ring to prove he can scream with the best of them.

He loves to be a part of the crowd and if adults are having a conversation around him he will lock eyes with you and then scream (usually a happy scream)...it is very funny.

He has started to really enjoy his baths - enough to laugh and smile during them.

His hair is getting so long and so curly!

He has really started to notice the dogs and will stare at them if they come close by.

If he gets a chance to look at the TV he will stare...bad news, huh? So I've been trying to cut down on my TV watching and have instead moved to radio. Kind of a nice change.

We went to California again, and hopefully for the last time unless it is on a vacation or to see friends/family. We set up shop in our apartment and readied it for our post-placement evaluation. We still have our Apartment there so if anyone needs a free place to stay in CA - by all means - USE IT!

Anyway onward to month 4. It is hard to be both anxious to get to know this little guy and be able to talk to him and at the same time wish he could stay this small for ever.

Xanders first major holiday...HALLOWEEN!!!

Our little guy recently enjoyed his first holiday. Too bad it was two days before the election otherwise we would have had more fun with it. It was fun to dress him up in his outfits he was given and take pictures over the few days of the weekend. We also purchased two big pumpkins - one large enough to stuff him into. As you can see, he seemed to enjoy it.



Grandma gave him this outfit:


Nonnie and Poppi gave him this outfit:



Being a Saturday/Sunday dilemma with Halloween this year the Trick or Treaters took advantage of the confusion - including these little rebels on Sunday!:



All in all a good year...I guess next year we will have to venture out in the cold and help our 1+ year old gather some goodies.

His first "laugh"

Yesterday I made a quick stop by Grandma's for a visit. During the visit I think Grandma taught Xander how to laugh! :-) She was playing with him and he gave a pretty good sustained "talk and squeal." Which seemed to be a collection of the sounds he has been making.




Today at the end of one of my meetings I was about ready to go and I looked down at him and he had a funny grin on his face. I asked him what was so funny and he started to "laugh." I couldn't believe it! It was something he had never done before. A sustained sound of laughter. It was adorable. I realized that what I saw yesterday at Grandma's was the beginning of a new phase for the little guy. Oh it was so cute. (The quality on this one might not be as great due to its loss on my cell phone and then hours upon hours of using recovery programs to finally get it back. I'm thrilled with the results)

2 months old

I hope my posts become more frequent than monthly but for now these will have to suffice. On Saturday Xander turned 2 months old! What a journey this has been and an exciting adventure to have. The joy of his 1 month birthday, smiling and laughing, has increased ten-fold. His smiles and laughs are now predictable and invokable. He smiles when he sees me or Brandon nearly every time now. What a joy that is!

So what is new this month?



He is now beginning to enjoy baths (somewhat) - which is a nice treat. Although he is still a little weirded out by the experience. Warming the water a bit more and adding to the depth (covering more of his cute nakedness) seems to do the trick (thanks for the advice, fam!). He can entertain himself for periods of time playing on his floor gym, or in his bassinet just having a great time all by himself.



This has been great for freeing up some time to clean bottles, do dishes, switch laundry, or work bits on the numerous little house projects we still have to do. He is SO aware - it is so much fun to see his growing interest in the world around him. I hope he gets a little more aware of/capable with his hands this month so toys will become a tool of engagement.

One of our favorite activities we have discovered is reading! When I first read that reading to the little guy at this young age is important I said, "I can't even hold up his head...what is the point in reading to him?" I quickly learned how wrong I was. Laying next to him on the bed or propping him up on my lap is a great way to read to him - and he LOVES it. He'll laugh, coo, stretch and smile at the book. His favorite book is Hooray for Diffindoofer Day by Dr. Seuss. I think the bright colors and rhythmic nature of the book helps. :-) What a fine time that is with my little guy. Grandma also gave us a few good ones like A Fly Flew By - which I like. :-)



Poor guy still has to get dragged to ALL my meetings and events. The entirety of the Democratic community in Salt Lake County knows him and loves him. We have received so many gifts, congratulations, and well wishes. What a loving and generous place we live. The great thing is there are always a million people wanting to hold him and give me a break! Such a young guy to be hanging out with County Councilmen and candidates for public office!


Right on his birthday we had a great event at Grandma and Grandpa's house. It was a BBQ shower to introduce Xander to all the family who hadn't seen the little guy yet. Most notably among those, the Roarks who missed his birth this summer by just a few days! It was so nice of them to drive 12 hours to come and see him. He loves his cousin Tanner, Kali, and Kaden and his Aunt Mim and Uncle Kev. We also had the pleasure of his Poppi coming out to stay with us. Thanks to Grandma for hosting the event with endless help from Amy, Kim, and Chelsea to make it a great evening. LOVE YOU ALL. It was also so great to introduce the little guy to his extended family.




Sad news for the month is that he had his first round of vaccinations at the Dr.'s office on Monday. Poor little guy. However, he handled it very well and seems to have no ill effects.



Finally, a historical note (yes, I am an advocate of the "a" historical vs the "an" historical) - four days before Xander was born 33 miners were trapped in a mine in Chile and 4 days after his 2 month b-day they were rescued. Kind of brings an interesting perspective and historical intrigue to the first couple months of the little guys life.



nicknames of note for this month: boobie, z-bub, dude, bubby, baby

1 Month Old

I can't believe how quickly the time has flown. Granted 9 days of his life was spent waiting in Wichita, but wow - one full month has gone by and our little man is 1 month old (okay, I realize this post is late and he is older than that now, but work with me). He is chunkin' up a bit - you can see it in his legs and his face.

The neatest thing happened the other day. On Sunday, the 12th, we were laying in bed with him and I was using my finger to simulate a missile coming to hit his tummy. Suddenly I had never seen him focus so much one spot. I noted it to Brandon as we played. Sure enough, it seems like the right synapse in his brain had just clicked. The next few days were filled with more "smiles" and "laughs" then I've ever seen! How fun is that! Sure they are in the early stages - but they ain't no gas smiles anymore. It is so fun to see the little guy develop and grow before our eyes. It makes me excited for tomorrow to see what new thing he will do. Lately he has been totally content laying down by himself looking at a mobile or toy hanging from above. He'll stare at it for a while and then give out a "laugh." His "laugh's" are a little like a squeak - but not like a mouse - more like a squeal.

This video shows him laugh a bit right at the beginning (then spit up) then the rest isn't too exciting - but his eyebrow raise about half-way through is worth listening to me go on and on- Ha!).



He is also so strong. His can pretty much keep his head up by himself now and when placed on his tummy, given enough time, he'll flip himself over to his back. He loves to stand up (with full support of dad, of course) and stare around the room. He loves to walk around the neighborhood and see the trees (or the light filtering through those funny dark objects). He has been sleeping pretty good - in fact, the other night we got an 8 hour night! WAHOOOO!!!! Usually he will sleep in 5 or 6 hour chunks which is pretty good. Let's see how long that'll hold out.

Here's a fun comparison

2 days old:



1 month old:


What a cute little guy. We are so lucky to have him!

The return home

It was so great to see so many people when we got back from Wichita. If Alexander only had any idea how many people flocked to our house to see him and demanded we brought him to places and events he would know truly how much he is loved. Overtime he will see what a great community of family and friends he is a part of.

Thank you for all the well wishes, congratulations, and gifts. You are all the best!

PS - Roarkies - we look forward to your first.

Alexander Russell Clark

Born August 9, 2010
7 lbs 6.8 oz
18.5 in tall

After a one-year process of endless paperwork, physicals, meetings, financial disclosures, and of the doling out of thousands of dollars Brandon and I were able to grow our family by one. On April 25th we were matched with a woman who lived in Wichita, Kansas who was looking for a loving home for her baby. She chose Brandon and me and the rest is history (a endlessly roller coaster of a history).

Here is the story of his birth:

On August 8th Brandon and I flew out to Wichita for the anticipated c-section birth of Xander. Our journey was a grand one from the beginning as just two days before that we found out we could be in Wichita for two weeks! How do you pack for the birth of your child, for two weeks, in a place you never really been. So many unknowns!!!



The first part of our trip was comically focused around finding a freezer for our breast-milk (Thanks Amy and Chelsea for starting off our little guy on the right foot!)! The clock of its defrosting started when we left our house so by the time we arrived in Wichita we were already concerned it was going to be melted. Luckily it was okay but we needed to get it into a freezer quick! When we got our car we just about drove away but decided it smelled too much of smoke and we didn't want our new son breathing that nasty air. So we waited to have it replaced...45 mins later we were on the road, milk slightly less frozen. We went to the hotel we had booked and found out there was a mistake and we didn't have the room until the next day. Yikes! So we quickly searched for a close hotel that had a freezer. Milk thawing... We quickly drove to the new hotel and I ran to the room with our cooler of milk. Mistake! No freezer in this room. The hotel staff then spent the next 30 mins looking for a room that for sure had at least a freezer section in the small room fridge. Finally - success!



Later that evening we got together with the birthmom of our son for dinner at Applebees. This was Brandon's first meeting but my second since I had come out a couple of weeks before to visit. After exchanging stories and getting to know one another a bit more we headed back to the hotel for our LAST night as a childless couple. We were nervous, excited, scared, happy, and just about everything else that night.



Before we knew it, it was time to head to the hospital. We packed up our gear - checked out of the hotel - and headed to the Via Christie Hospital (yes, a Catholic hospital - gay couple adopting a baby in a Catholic Hospital in the middle of Kansas - *gulp). Once we got there we headed up to the hospital room to meet up with birthmom and her good friend. The doctors came in and prepared mom for the impending surgery. Not too long after that mom and friend headed to the operating room - too bad for us - only one person allowed.



We went out into the waiting room and began our 3 hour wait before we got to see our baby. While waiting the white knight of the whole process showed up - Joann, our Wichita social worker. We had never met her but she was there to ensure the process in Kansas went well. She not only was an advocate for the birthmom but an advocate for us - especially for our rights as the future parents of our son. She stayed with us for quite some time while we waited. We knew birthmom would have to go into surgery for about an hour..then recover for 1 to 2 hours. One hour after we left mom while we were in the waiting room chatting with Joann we heard a voice come over the intercom. Shorter after 10:40 AM a recorded message announced to the hospital that a "new baby has been born!" We knew this was our son!



Then the real waiting game began because we weren't sure how soon we were going to see him. While we waited Joann helped us establish a hospital room next to the birthmom's room so that we could both share in the experience of his birth. About an hour after the intercom announcement the birthmom's friend came out of the recovery room with the first pictures and video of our son. What an awesome experience. As I write this now I can remember how awesome that felt to see him. Having some time to digest it all I can now better realize how amazing that experience really was. An hour later while we were getting set in our room and passing time by browsing the internet and chatting birthmom arrived with baby in tow! I saw him first and quickly ran over and picked him up off of the wheeled bed birthmom was laying on.

I was holding my son. W O W.



I quickly passed him on to Brandon for his first hold. It was one of those surreal moments that are so fleeting. It is one of those moments where you feel so compelled to take pictures endlessly trying to capture the moment but in reviewing the pictures it never feels the same - because a camera can never pick up the emotion, the excitement, and the sensations of holding your son for the very first time.
From that moment on we have had the little guy. Other than brief visits over to birthmom.



The night of his birth we had narrowed our names for the little guy down to four - Connor, Carter, Owen, and Zachary. Funny that we ended up with non of them. For some reason none of them fit. So we went back to the first name we had chosen months ago - Alexander.



We stayed at the hospital for two nights. We had him both nights and cherished every moment of it. It was somewhat awkward with all the hospital staff coming in and some seeming like they were less than approving of this adoption. Was it adoption in general? Was it this birthmom? Was it this adoptive family? Who knows. Who cares. A few close-minded people were not going to ruin this experience for us. These two days flew by. He passed all his health checks with flying colors and they let us go Wednesday morning, August 11th.





Funny story here - hospital policy required that the baby was transported out of the hospital being carried by someone, presumably mom, in a wheelchair. This makes sense if the person carrying baby out had just been through a major surgery. Me - I had to make a 70-year old woman push my fat a** in a wheel chair out the front door past all the strange looks and odd jeers of the hospital staff and visitors. After a somewhat emotional goodbye to birthmom (she was staying until that evening, but we knew we'd see her again before leaving Wichita) we headed out to freedom....sort of.

Due to the complications of laws involved in the process we had to stay in Kansas for a few days - up to and possibly over two weeks. We weren't sure how long but had settled in for the long haul. We stayed at the Value Place hotel - a rent-by-the-week place which had a full kitchen. Not glamorous - but did the job. We begin our new routine of bottle-warming, breastmilk thawing, formula mixing, sleep interrupting, cooing, kissing, and cuddling. What a new world - and what a strange place to do it.



Luckily we had a couple of visitors to give us a hand and give us some much needed family company.



The day after our release Grandma came to help out and meet her new grandchild. The next day his grandma (Nonnie - pronounced No-knee) on Brandon's side of the family came too. It was so great to have them there if anything to break up the monotony of the small hotel room. They also gave us confidence to leave the hotel room and endless, needed, motherly advice. It was so great to have them there.




While it was so annoying that we had to stay there as long as we did we can also look at the silver lining - we got to spend uninterrupted, priceless hours bonding with our son. How many people get to do that? We quickly adjusted to life in a hotel room with baby in the pack-n-play. We learned all the ins and outs of bottle use and sleepless nights. It was an amazing and memorable time of our new young family's life.



Finally 9 days after we had arrived and 8 days after we got there we got the okay to leave the state. We had to get all the papers signed and so we headed over to birthmom's house for our last visit and all the paper/legal work. This was one of the more emotional moments of the trip - the big goodbye. While birthmom was resolved in her decision it was still a sad and happy moment for everyone. We signed all the paperwork without problem, gave hugs to everyone, and headed to the airport.



Our flight had a layover in Colorado for a couple hours so we were able to see Brandon's sister, Xander's new cousins, his uncle and his grandpa (Poppi). It was so great to see them on our way!



Then finally we got home. It was so nice to see the girls and be home at last. We were quickly getting tons of visitors from family and friends. It was so great to be back home and feel the warmth and love from so many people. Once the glow was over we quickly settled into our new "routine" which from here on out will be known as Xander's Xoo.